7 Uncomfortable Time Management Truths
I sat there with my to-do list staring me down.
7 proposals due
10 emails to draft and send
5 PowerPoint decks to complete
The red notification of unread IMs taunted me from the bottom of the screen. All of them from someone likely asking about the status of each of these incomplete projects. Or, worse, adding a new project to my list.
And I had dinner plans to get to…
Was it just a little time management I needed to get it all done and out the door by 5?
The Truth About Time Management
We’re led to believe better time management and productivity is the secret.
Just manage your time and be more efficient and you’ll get more done.
This dream state leaves us defining “get more done” as:
Finishing that to-do list once and for all
Pleasing everyone around you by never missing a deadline or commitment
Meeting all expectations you set for yourself
Accomplishing all your hopes and dreams with plenty of time left over for hobbies and vacations and Netflix binging
But, the truth is, time management isn’t about successfully finishing the race of life with nothing left to do.
Time management is uncomfortable.
Time management forces you to face reality.
Time management requires tough choices and hard conversations.
Time management can be downright disappointing when you realize you aren’t going to be able to do all the things you had hoped to.
“It’s painful to confront how limited your time is because it means tough choices are inevitable and you won’t have time for all you once dreamed you might do.” - Four Thousand Weeks, Time Management for Mortals, Oliver Burkeman
7 Uncomfortable Time Management Truths
Time Management Truth #1: The end of your to-do list doesn’t exist
Regardless of how fast you are at checking off all the big and little tasks on your to-do list, life is constantly adding more. Likely at a faster rate than you can keep up with.
Empty the dishwasher: CHECK
But give it another 24-48 hours and that thing will be magically full once again.
Complete quarterly report: CHECK
But 3 more “ASAP” projects are waiting right behind that one. Deadlines looming.
It’s irrational to think that it’s possible to finish everything. You are fighting reality and will lose every time.
What you get done is enough.
You are in control of defining what “enough” is. As well as the pros and cons that come along with it.
Time Management Truth #2: You can’t avoid saying ‘no’
If your default mode is people-pleaser, this is an especially tough truth.
When you’re competent and able to create a high output, it’s easy to convince yourself that if you just work a little harder, you can avoid the discomfort of telling someone ‘no’.
But whether you realize it or not, you’re already saying ‘no’ all day, every day. Every task you pick up is saying ‘no’ to 5 others.
Since you’re saying ‘no’ already, start being intentional with your ‘nos’.
Saying ‘no’ is confirming your priorities. Look at what you currently get done each day. Those are your priorities. Whether you like them or not.
So ask yourself, if you work on task A, can you still do task B & C? If not, would you rather complete task B & C instead of task A? These decisions all require a ‘no’ somewhere.
Good time management is about missing out. Resist the FOMO. Just say ‘no’.
Time Management Truth #3: The productivity bar is getting higher
When you learn how to be more efficient and get more done, you increase your expectations that you can do even more.
Those around you also likely expect a higher output than average.
Don’t drive yourself into the ground trying to keep up. It’s a race you can’t win.
Decide what your time limits are. How much time are you willing to put into each area of your life? Then plan around that commitment to yourself.
The solution to an ever-increasing workload is not to work 60+ hour weeks. Or more. Find a different solution for that problem. Even if it does mean doing less. (i.e. refer to truths 1 and 2.)
Time Management Truth #4: You can’t succeed with constant distractions
You think you’re being helpful by remaining readily available, allowing constant interruptions from email and IMs and innocent passersby. You respond quickly in an effort to keep everyone moving on their own growing to-do lists.
This isn’t a winning strategy.
You will never be able to make meaningful progress on your own work if you don’t give yourself a chance to focus.
Pick your priority then get heads down to complete it. Even if you commit to just 30 minutes to be undistracted, take it.
It is unrealistic to expect your brain to be able to get anything done with a constant barrage of notifications while you context switch from one topic to the next. Your ongoing overwhelm and end-of-day frustration is elevated with every distraction you allow in.
It is a must to defend your time from these energy drains.
Time Management Truth #5: You’re trying to control the wrong thing
Time management is about fighting for control.
You want to feel like you have a say in what your day-to-day looks like and, ultimately, what your life looks like.
But you’re fighting to control the wrong thing. You cannot control time. It never stops moving forward. No matter how much you try to control it.
While you can’t truly control and manage your time… you can manage yourself.
You have control over your choices. Over your reactions. Over your perspective.
Stop focusing on time. Look internally and start focusing on you and how you’re approaching your life.
Time Management Truth #6: You suck at estimating your time
We are all terrible at estimating how long something will take.
There’s no way to know how long a brand-new task will need. You’ll have a learning curve. You’ll have unknowns you didn’t even think to plan for.
Even the tasks you’ve done over and over can trip you up. Maybe your internet goes out. Or a tickle in your throat signifies the looming inevitability of being knocked out for a few days by your yearly cold.
Planning your time is a complete guessing game. One you’re never going to be perfect at.
But an imperfect plan is a better roadmap than no plan at all.
So, make a best guess then go with the flow. (Control freaks…breathe with me…)
Give yourself room for unexpected situations to come up. Be open to re-evaluating your plans. And, definitely stop beating yourself up when you get it wrong. No one has time for that.
Time Management Truth #7: Managing your time must start with managing your mindset
You have to first believe you have some control over what you spend your time doing.
Until you believe this, you will continue to let others decide for you.
Sure, you may not be able to decline all those meeting invites or avoid the last-minute project with an urgent deadline that just landed on your desk.
But, ask yourself where you do have some control.
Focus there. What do you want to do with those moments?
As you start to train yourself to see these small opportunities, more will start to present themselves.
And before you know it, you’ll be calling all the shots in your day.
“The bad news is time flies. The good news is, you’re the pilot.”
- Michael Altshuler
Conclusion
Now that you know the truth…you can start to remove the expectations and judgments that follow you around.
You’re not doing time management wrong because you still have a long list of things to get done.
You aren’t missing out on some secret that will finally allow you to “win” at life.
And the eb and flow of overwhelm doesn’t mean you are destined to a life of misery.
You just need to face some uncomfortable truths. A little dose of reality so you can get out of your own way to focus on living.
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About Me
Hi, I’m Kara. I’m a former workaholic turned time-management expert. I help women stressed out in their 9-5 get more done, in less time, so they can get back in the driver’s seat and start living a life they love.
